I can pretend to be ok.
I can laugh, smile and even crack jokes.
I can face the universe and its constant reminders of Caleb.
I can assure concerned family and friends that I will get through this.
But every so often the numb wears off and the pain burns thick.
Even my tears can't put out these fires.
So I let the flames die on their own.
I embrace the pain, guilt and loss.
Then I pretend to be ok again.
Big hugs to you today. Your post yesterday really struck home with me...today is a blah day for me too. "Mrs. X my teacher this year is pregnant too" all I wanted to say was well I hope hers is successful. I'm still trying to figure out how along she is without asking...due July.
ReplyDeleteThank you Amy. I know its hard to be happy for others pregnancies right now. I know closed to your own/my own due date will be much more difficult. - One day at a time.
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